Great Clips Massacre

Just when I was beginning to wonder what I was going to post (material has been lacking), the universe dropped this little gem into my lap. The plan for this afternoon was simple: Pick my son up. Take him to get a hair cut at Great Clips. Procure fast food. Grab a few things from [...]

DID SOMEONE BOOKSGIVING ME?!

What is Booksgiving? It's a Jenny Lawson holiday. She's kind of a HUGE deal to me, seeings how she's my favorite author/blogger AND I WOULD PROBABLY MAKE IT INCREDIBLY AWKWARD IF I EVER MET HER! I'd want to be best friends but because I'd make it weird thanks to fan girling so hard, she'd possibly [...]

This Post Is Probably Going To Make Me Late To Drop Off My Kid

I’m in a weird place right now. I mean, there are some great things happening behind the scenes. Very excited about them! But my trip last weekend left me with some big questions. It was a fun trip. However, anytime my friend, Drew, is involved, there are always lots of laughs, along with great decisions. [...]

Antler Fingers Are For The Workplace

I argue that they are for everyday use and wouldn't be creepy at all. My gentleman caller disagrees, EVEN THOUGH HE WAS THE ONE WHO OFFERED TO MAKE ME REPLACEMENT FINGERS! But I'm getting ahead of myself, so let's back up so I can give you an edited version of how this conversation happened. And [...]

Ghosts Are Dicks and Joan Cusack is Down To Earth

Neither of these two things are related to the other- I'm just trying to get us caught back up and on track because I know you're curious what I've been up to this week. I appreciate you. You've missed a couple of important events during my absence: my sister cousin road trip to Galena, Kansas [...]

Why Hasn’t Anyone Sent Me Penis Glitter?!

Wednesday did not go as planned. Due to snow, I canceled my oil change and dental appointment. I also made sure to get outside and play in the snow while wearing my obnoxious snow boots that I've barely used the past few years. Five year old Amber was super happy. Snow is beautiful. Magical. And [...]

Panic in the ladies room

I don't feel very funny today. Despite all of the pep talks I gave myself, the drops of CBD, I still had a mild panic attack at work during the all staff meeting. I found myself hiding in the bathroom in an attempt to pull it together. Thankfully, by the time I came out, it [...]

Let’s try to end this on a medium note

I'm standing in the kitchen shoveling seconds into my empty bowl when I hear my son tell my father: "I found a $900 calf". WHY IS MY CHILD LOOKING FOR A CALF?! WTF ARE THE TWO OF THEM GOING TO DO WITH IT?! I quickly realized he had said cab. Like the cab of a [...]