IN CASE YOU THOUGHT I WAS LYING.

My face is wrong today. I am self conscious; therefore, this is all you get.

Why am I uncomfortably sitting beneath my desk when I have a bed full of blankets that are way more comfortable to hide under, you ask?

Because blankets aren’t going to cut it. Besides, that’s where people always look first. My life, which I am currently hiding from, will take a little longer to find me here.

Even if it only buys me an extra 5 seconds, I will take those 5 seconds.

Clearly, it’s not my worst mental health day. But also not my strongest.

This past weekend was SO GREAT! I was able to have alone alone time. The kind where you can sit around in your underwear BECAUSE NO ONE IS AROUND AND NO ONE WAS GOING TO BE AROUND. I don’t remember the last time I had that! I felt tons better- dare I say REFRESHED for the week ahead.

I mean, I adopted Harold this weekend. That alone is a weekend win. You guys have seen him- he’s adorable! If there was a beauty contest for moss balls, Harold would absolutely nail it AND end up with a modeling contract.

And for those of you concerned for him, yes, I DID swish our favorite little ball of algae around like a gentle lake wave this afternoon. We love us some round boys over here.

Harold and I bonding. As for my face- it does what it wants.

Enter today. Monday morning. Specifically late morning work time.

As the day progressed, I thought my grouchy, irritable, “can’t get out of my pissy thoughts” mood was thanks to being back home. The place I have to verbally communicate with other humans. Where space is limited. Privacy, even more so.

But the more I thought about it, I’m overwhelmed work wise. All of us on my team have been for a while. It’s frustrating to spend 8 hours a day, five days a week, not really getting ahead. For some of my coworkers, they are getting behind a little more each day.

Overtime has been helpful but when you’re already burnt out and working more hours, it’s the perfect cocktail to push you to the point that hiding underneath your desk seems to be the only logical solution.

And here we are.

I have reverted into a tired 5 year old who wants snacks, soft blankets, her favorite plushies, and a nap. Maybe even a warm bubble bath!

Oh man, a bubble bath with hot cocoa would definitely hit the spot.

However, my evening looks more like taking a couple hours off so I am refreshed enough to clock back in because those external ROIs aren’t going to fax themselves. Though they are welcome to.

But do not fear.

Things should improve eventually. They’re hiring a temp and are looking to potentially hire someone else to join our team. Permanently.

And I will be taking some time off the first week in March. Hoping to spend some of that time prancing around nature. Lots of nature. Maybe even write my very first nerdy nature journal entry!

Until that happens, if you need me, I’ll be under my desk. Sobbing internally.

Please send cute animal TikToks to fill my heart with joy. And many giggles.

More posts to come.

Published by amberalice

Kansas Native. Knitter. Amateur photographer. Lover of love, plants, and great burritos.

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